From Self-Doubt to Self-Belief

When I first got my teaching license, I choose to get it in New Hampshire, even though I lived just over the border in Vermont.

It was easier. I just had to submit my transcripts and pay.

Oddly enough, I never taught in New Hampshire; all my teaching took place in Vermont, under a provisional license, until I applied for Vermont licensure.

Except I intentionally never applied for my Vermont license.

You see, Vermont required applicants pass the Praxis test.

Early in my career I shifted between jobs which allowed to to dodge the issue.

Then I stopped shifting.

My employer was asking for my Vermont License.

For about a year I used different tactics that bought me time.

In reality I was just blowing it off.

Until it finally caught up with me and I ran out of time.

I remember like it was yesterday.

We were out of town at a conference, sitting on the beds in the hotel room when my boss asked about my license.

No blowing that off.

It was all coming to a head.

I feared I was going to be fired.

I cried as I admitted the truth.

I told her I didn't test well and I was convinced I would fail the Praxis.

She sat quietly for an uncomfortably long time, adding to the anxiety.

Then, in the most compassionate tone, she asked me a question that forever altered my perspective, “Julie, you truly have no idea how smart you are, do you?”

There were more tears as I responded with a resounding “No."

This is how Mean Girl becomes programed:

People tell us things.

We believe them.

People treat us like these things are true.

That further reinforces our negative beliefs and creates self-doubt

We see evidence, like poor test scores, that validate and confirm our insecurities.

We begin to accept these false beliefs as our reality, and they dictate our actions and choices.

From the time I was a child until that moment in 2007 I had been holding myself back, missing out on opportunities because of self doubt.

I truly believed I wasn't smart enough.

Everyone possesses intelligence, worth, and the right to pursue their dreams.

When someone tries to convince you otherwise, it reflects their issues, not yours.

Seek evidence that disproves their accusations or any self-limiting beliefs you have. that the opposite is true.

Don't stop looking until you find it.

Never stop believing in your potential.

You are deserving, capable, and more than enough.

If you ever need support on your journey to conquering self-doubt and embracing self-belief, I’m here to help.

PS. I passed the Praxis. Proving self-belief can overcome self-doubt.